Stop Chasing "Set for Life"

Have you ever said to yourself, "If I can do this, get this, have this — I will be set for life?" I have. Many times, over the past 30 years.

When I took some time off in 2024, I did some reflecting on the chasing of that feeling and why I was hellbent on trying to be "set for life." I worked with a coach, and after a few sessions and analyzing various examples, the lightbulb went off. It was a simple idea, almost annoyingly obvious once you hear it out loud: there's no such thing as being "set for life."

Most of us grow up believing this mythical moment exists — a number in the bank, a title, a business sale, a finish line we think will deliver permanent ease or certainty. We imagine that once we reach it, we'll exhale for the rest of our lives. No stress, no questions, no doubts.

But that moment isn't real, and more importantly, the pursuit of this carries a cost.

The key takeaway from my coaching sessions: "When people say they want to be set for life, they're not chasing a reality — they're chasing a feeling." It's the imagined feeling of safety, love, validation, or completion.

Here's the problem: because the target is a feeling, not a fact, it moves. Every time you get close, it shifts. Every win is discounted because it isn't the win. Every milestone is dismissed because it isn't that milestone.

While we search for being "set for life," we missed out on the real tangible validations that were sitting right in front of us. The wins we earned, the progress we made, the risks and challenges we survived, the people we helped, and the complex problems we solved.

Now I am still focused on short-term and long-term personal and professional goals. I am still driven by the idea of building success with the company I recently acquired. However, it's not tied to a set dollar amount, a timeframe for an exit strategy, or a set date in the future to stop working. As my wife says from time to time, "Let the universe do its thing."

To summarize: being "set for life" isn't a finish line — it's a mindset.

We become "set for life" by realizing we're already living it, one earned win at a time.